Beautiful....and how we define it

Good morning all...
I have been spending time praying this week for people who have CONSISTENTLY been there for others, who are ALWAYS THE STRONG ONES....and who right now, need others.

It got me thinking about the word, beautiful....and what the society we live in, defines as beauty.

I am referring to the angels on earth kinds of folks, who have ALWAYS been there to clean up others' messes. They function in roles to care for the ill in life....OR in an assisting role to those who do the actual hands on care for others, or trying to be an example for others....or in lives of complete service.

Many of these folks, also care for others in their families, who cant do everything needed for themselves..... and constantly, I know they've been told, they're beautiful souls.

Yet, when something drastic happens, and they need help, people have a holy makerel....oh my gosh....no way! reaction.... and in some minds, beauty pales. Strength diminishes....   humanity reveals itself. And then, they arent seen with the same light. Or when something bad in the past comes up....folks back off.  Perfection...disapears.

We all enjoy seeing human intrest stories....where theres a happy ending....and God shines like the brightest day. Its how we define 'beautiful'. Its usually only in the good outcome we see it....

But......
Here's something to think about.  Jesus WASNT seen as a beautiful angel/prophet/Savior when he walked among us.  He did WONDERFUL things for people who were in need. He was there for everyone...
But he was looked at as a rebel. A troublemaker.... a threat. A criminal. Someone who was mocked for breaking God's laws....

His death was barbaric...and he said and did things that made people mad. Because he shook the very ground they stood on....and what they defined as beautiful.

What do we call him today?  Beautiful Savior.
God re-defined Jesus for us....in HIS eyes.....instead of ours.

Guys....  people fall off pedestals WE choose to put them on, in our own minds....
We define people as 'right' 'wrong' 'good' 'bad'
And we're a very fickle society.  A GOOD person....becomes bad, in a heartbeat in our world.  In our relationships, trust is like glass... and once its broken, we become often like the crowd, shouting 'CRUCIFY HIM'!  Sadly....Sometimes we wait around to see the fallout.... and we relish it when failure happens.....if 'beautiful' goes by the wayside.

Its a good thing the Lord and Lady see "beauty" differently.  I know if they judged me by human standards....I would be in trouble. I cant stand on a pedestal. I make a mess of my life sometimes.....  And, I've been judged and looked at like I'm on a path to destruction in my life.....

I'm reminded of what Christ said to the two criminals who were crucified with him:

"This day I tell you, you will be with me in Paradise...."

I think we need to re-define beautiful.....
Beauty exists in those who have made the biggest mistakes possible in the world.

Beauty exists in being there for each other. And one 'bad' event in life, doesnt erase the beauty of that life....that relationship in God's eyes.....

Christ asked 'Father forgive them, for they know not what they do"....  he forgave, and recognized the beauty in those who took his life.

Beauty is in forgiveness.....and in walking away from things that make us define it any other way.....

Sending love....blessed be

A few thoughts on being good enough.....

 

 

 

Do you hear this coming from your life at all?

Namaste all!  I hope you're having a great weekend!  I've been having a reoccurring theme happen in my life the past few years.....and I wanted to share something that happened this week that sort of cements for me THIS is why I am here.....this is my life's purpose. And I believe....YOU are reading this for a reason as well.....

 

You've probably noticed that in past posts, I explained that I had spent years of my life trying to fit into what everyone TOLD me I was....who everyone else defined me to be.  And....that I never felt good enough.....even for myself.

 

I was meditating earlier this week, and was drawn to remember a scripture from my Catholic upbringing.....

       

Matthew 6:25-34 ESV     

“Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. ...
********************
I also was drawn to a video from Afterlife TV, that contained an interview with a woman who lost her son to a disease at a very young age....
In the video, she talks about what her son taught her, and is STILL teaching her today. 
http://youtu.be/R0nw5JsNTN4

This young man could not care for himself....at all. His mother did everything for him.  Yet he touched her life in extraordinary ways. HE was enough....even though his body was not like everyone else's in the world.  He was provided for....and he accomplished his purpose here. He continues to change the world today......

In the video, the woman talks about what her son has taught her about the 'Life Review' that some say they go through during an NDE.  Some people see loved ones.....beautiful places....

Others have an entirely different experience....where they see suffering....anguish....Hell. Yet they ALL come back from either experience a changed being....seeing life differently. With a different meaning.....and many reach out to fellow man, as well as opening up to recognizing different realities than what they believed before. Realities that are different about themselves, and about this life. 

The woman explains that the life reviews reflect what WE need to learn....a lesson that we are working on to grow as a soul.  She even explains pain....and people who do terrible things in this life....such as terrorists or Hitler.....

She simply says....that PAIN....ILLNESS and TRAGEDY is meant to teach us. Its meant to teach us our worth....and our strength.....both personally, and collectively!
And if you think about it....it makes sense.  Because in the face of tragedy--what do we do as a people? We support. We pray--we reach out to one another. And we love.....
And....we become enough for each other to make it through.  We discover our worth.

As a Witch....I've slowly been learning that my being does contain everything I need. I AM enough, because of who I am made to be, and because the Lord and Lady are within me.....but my DUTY is to reach out and to give of my unique gifts to others....and be open to receiving what they have to share.  And I am beginning to expect that kind of respect from those around me.  I wasn't always of that mindset.  At times, quite frankly, I was the proverbial doormat.....and then I walked around hurting and wounded.

Amazingly....my husband to be is one of the catalysts that the Lord and Lady used in the past few months to drive this point home.  He and I have both been working on dealing with this 'doormat' issue in our lives.....and he emphatically told me point blank when I was upset talking to him recently, that I needed to speak up and not be worried about hurt feelings.  I shouldn't let anyone step on me....and he included himself in that statement.  He explained how HE sees me as a person.....and that he expected me to walk with dignity....with EVERYONE.....

And he can tell you--I've been working on taking that to heart....because it is important.  I still slip....I'm human. But its becoming something I am not afraid to express....and to reach for.

Here's the part of what occurred that totally blew me away today.......
I was meditating on the events above....and I asked for any other light to be shed on what I needed to know about this path.  One thing came to mind.....and its something I am going to have to ponder for a very long time.

'What if the BIGGEST transgression we can make in life is walking around not being enough?'

I think my jaw hit the floor with that.  I honestly think that being enough, and REALIZING IT--is why we're ALL here.  I mean, Christianity teaches that Jesus was killed to cover us for wrongdoing....to basically 'make us enough'.....yet look at the words above from the very book that guides it all!  Jesus also reached out to those who were treated as though they were NOT enough....and recognized them as enough by his compassion. And he told them to go forth in that light.  He treated those who wanted to squash that with contempt....and his very life and death was a protest against the fact that people were NOT treated as enough! 

Now.....look back at the sentence above, that I underlined in bold.....and contemplate this.....
'He was wounded for our transgressions. He was bruised for our iniquity'!  His whole entire ministry, and the reason he was sent, was BECAUSE we don't recognize our own value--either in ourselves, or in each other!


My whole life has been a dichotomy.....I was walking wounded. But I really was built to be enough!

I now know, I was born a Witch.  And I was fighting that....because it wasn't good in the eyes of others.  I wasn't 'inherently' good as a Christian, because I was born in Sin....and would never be healed unless I 'put on Christ'.  But--at church each week, it was like I had to continue to repent....like I still wasn't enough--even though I tried to walk with Christ.  I was ALWAYS broken.....I could walk out of the church on my feet, but somehow, during the week, it was like I was brought to my knees again....not enough.  Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying its OK to hurt others, or disrespect anyone....in fact, as a Witch, I firmly feel I am responsible to 'DO NO HARM'.  What I am saying here though--is that it is precisely that which we are ALL to learn here in this life....

That is why we suffer....to teach us that together....we rise above that. Tragedy and pain, illness and sin are not a part of us....they are outside of us....we RESPOND to it....and we learn from it.

As a Witch...I've learned to stand tall. Yes, I make mistakes. But, I don't dwell on them, and I try to move forward.  Again....reoccurring theme.  The dawning light for me was today....with that sentence in bold.  I CANT walk around feeling less than I am anymore....otherwise....I miss my chance in this life to make a difference.  And I want to thank my husband, as well as the Lord and Lady....for actually breaking through more of that wall I had up of realizing that....

Namaste........

Bullying---why do people want to hush the stories of those who went through it?

There is something on my mind today that REALLY bugs me.  I have a friend who wants to write a story about her experience of being bullied, but her family and others are saying things to discourage her.  Why on earth is it that people are so quick to sweep these things under the rug and pretend they don't exist??  Why is it that kids and even adults are basically told to suck it up....its over--move on?

People who bully NEED to be called out. Its not about stepping on toes, its about what's not acceptable in our society.  I don't care who you are....if you treat me wrong, you WILL be called out. I won't bully you myself when I do call you out on it...but I respect myself enough NOT to sweep it under the rug.  On top of it...maybe if those who are bullies are embarrassed enough by being labeled as one--they'll stop!

I did call someone out on his behavior towards me when I was a kid. He was relentless. For years. And I finally had had enough.  He was in class with me one day, and just would not leave me alone.

 I turned around, and looked him in the eyes....and said "Richard--that's not nice. And I don't like it. Why are you acting this way toward me? I don't deserve to be treated this way by you...or by anyone else. And if you don't stop....I will report it to the school officials."  I turned back around....and continued with my day. From that day on, he was actually friendly. We weren't 'friends', but he respected me....BECAUSE I stood up for myself with strength. And when I did this, I did it loud enough that those around us that were egging him on, could hear it.

Bullies are actually extremely insecure people inside. And they're not used to being called out in a matter of fact manor. I did this without anger, without tears....even though I was completely fed up. I just calmly basically put him in his place. And that's what needs to happen.

Its time for people to stop accepting this kind of behavior from others. End of story. The minute we stop sweeping it under the rug and put the spotlight on these things....the less intense they will become. NO one likes living in a fishbowl, unless they have gills and fins.

I have one more word to go with this post.....and that is "TAWANDA!"  If you've seen Fried Green Tomatoes, you know why!

Blessed be!

In Memory--and in love

My Lord and Lady....I am struggling today. 

Struggling between my humanness, what I feel, what I have seen,  and what I KNOW.  How do I set my emotional , human self apart from the reality of what you have taught me?  I've experienced your realm in this life...I was called home to you for a short time...so I know what happens when we leave this life.....I KNOW because I was there.

Yet....today, I hurt.  

I was faced by 'loss' in two circumstances this past weekend. They both hit my human heart like a ton of bricks.  I've faced a lot of 'loss' in different ways in the past 5 years.  Some instances of it were welcome....some not so much....

The two souls I have had to contemplate loss of this past weekend were NOT welcome loss.....

Judy.....

This lady is nothing short of BEYOND special to me. She was there for me when no one else understood what I was going through...(though others desperately tried to be understanding) and she allowed me to put a barrier up against a barrage of negativity in a time where I really needed to go with my gut...and not feel guilty for doing so.  Judy was able to be lovingly, yet truthfully objective.....and she encouraged me to trust my own instincts.....

We never met face to face....
A HUGE regret I have.

Judy was able to speak strictly from her experiences in life, and feelings about me in a pure way, without letting the day to day circumstances surrounding me filter in. I needed that. She allowed the real me to speak to her....without judgement....and was not afraid to tell me things that I might NOT want to hear....but she did it in a loving way. Differently perspective wise than anyone close to the surrounding events could. She also (along with others) helped me through the uncertainty of my pregnancy, and the loss of my child.  Again, in a fashion that was different than anyone physically standing here with me could. There was just something deeply profound between she and I...that cannot be put into words.

Judy passed away last week...suddenly, unexplainedly. 

The loss I feel is causing physical pain....as she is a true, real friend. The kind of friend that rarely comes in this life. It hurts. This relationship will NEVER be past tense for me. But nor am I ready for it to change.

My Lord and Lady.....I know on most levels of consciousness that I have not 'lost' this beautiful soul....as we do not die. I know...because my body died at one time...yet I went on. It was beautiful....and still is, even though I was sent back here. But my human emotional self--this body, this heart, and my very soul is crying today.  Selfishly so....because of love. And maybe longing....because I want to see her, experience the strength that just shown in her.....and spend time with others that have moved forward in our journey with you. I am happy here in my life now....VERY happy....but I already miss her. 

 Help me to heal this heart and be able to live in love knowing she is at peace...stop the ache and be happy for her....

I know I should....because I've been there.

*******

The second loss I faced this weekend hasn't actually occurred.....but its rearing up to be possible.....

Bootsie


Boots has been a part of our lives since before she was born. Her momma was a kitty we rescued from starvation when she was pregnant.  I watched her birth....I've watched her grow, I've played with her, worried about her....and enjoyed her.

Shes been sick....and we don't know why.  Doctors can't find a reason for it....and we've tried and tried the 'tried and true' methods to make her feel better.  We are having to face the possibility of not having the ability to be anything but  realistic in this crazy world view of what is important.....built on money and credit to survive....over love.  At some point, a difficult choice may have to be made....because THIS world, does not empirically live on love--the way the next life does. I hurt because of that.....

Right now she is ok....sleeping beside me. Her warmth against my leg and sweet paw across my feet.  Seemingly feeling better.....but I ache for her illness.  You have made me as a soul that wants to heal....and wants to love. To reach out and touch others no matter the risk. 

 Now I reach for you to rise above the way loving in this world has its 'endings'.  Help me not be blinded by the veil this world puts on loss such as this. It isnt real....it isnt the way it is. Its not truth.....but the hurt feels true.

I love you.....I want to rise above these feelings back to you!

Memories are bitter sweet......but only in this life.

Limited or Limitless?

There's something that is really troubling to me about the way some of those I care about see themselves in life.....

They see themselves as LIMITED.

Limitations, of all sorts are imposed. Either self imposed, mentor imposed, or circumstantially imposed. But....does that mean that because someone or something, or even you yourself make it seem like you are limited in a situation....that you actually ARE?

I don't believe so....not even the tiniest bit....with any bit of fiber in my being.  In any circumstance, the only limit that exists is failure to try.   Even if YOU don't consider your attempt a success.....that is a limitation your own thoughts put on the outcome.  My question to you if you constantly say to yourself....'I failed'.....is, did you learn from what happened? If so, its not a failure....you moved forward.  Even the tiniest realization....down to, well, there's a better way, or even....well, that didn't work.....means you learned you need to look for another door. 

Even in walking with the Lord and Lady.....if you believe in your being that they know you, hear you, and dwell with you.....and you live and walk with that....there are NO limits to what you can do on that path, for those around you....and for this world.  But if you live your path in the light that there is a ceiling.....that you are small, weak, and unable to stand, you simply won't.

I see this being taught EVERYWHERE.....that we are limited in our potential.  Who in the world decided for you that you can't do something?  And why....when you have already come this far in life, do you want to listen to that?  (I'm sick....I can't. Its just not in my make up....I can't.  It's always been that way...it always will be.)

I've learned something about people.....let me share a big glaring truth that people treat as secret....

If someone tells you you can't do something....or when someone tells you you can't rise above something....its because THEY are missing that drive within themselves.  If YOU tell yourself you can't change.....you won't. You have to want to. You have to have the drive to do it.  Limitation is one of the biggest lies people tell themselves....and believe as though there is no other truth.

I have a confession to make.....

I used to sit wallowing in limitations.   My parents had to tell me that 'CAN'T' isnt a part of my vocabulary....and they never stopped pushing me. I fought SO hard to prove them wrong....they'll tell you, I was a royal pain.  I fought against everything that was difficult....with nails and teeth. And it was ME that was wrong.  As I began to grow, people got scared. and I started to get bold. But I was confused too. I would hear things like....

'But what are you going to do if this happens?  You don't have it all planned out.'  

 'I don't think its a good idea if you do that....'

"What are you going to do when there is no one there to help you?'

I let each one of these questions stop me in my tracks even after becoming bold.... for a very long time....and I began to doubt myself again. I began to think....ya know what?  I DON'T have it all planned out. I don't KNOW what I would do in a given situation when I have to rely on myself....so I just can't do it.  

For a long time, I swallowed the feelings others shared that THEY had.....that the fact I DIDN'T know, was something that was unacceptable, and not ok.  And I stopped living. I barricaded myself with the fears and limitations of those feelings. I allowed the bubble to be built around me....because others wanted me safe.  THEIR idea of safe for me.

All these questions and fears were out of love, and were real in THEIR lives.... it was their insecurity coming out.  I made the mistake of letting it block me...not realizing the truth. And, I wasn't at all satisfied with life, with myself, or living with hope for the future. Until one day....I decided it wasn't good enough for me to stay in the bubble.  It dawned on me.....

NO one has life all planned out.....and if they say they do, it doesn't work the way they planned......
Your life is not a good idea for someone else to live.....because its not theirs.

No one has all the answers for every circumstance. 

And the truth is.....

ITS OK!!!!!!

This is true for our sacred path with the Lord and Lady too.  We DON'T have a complete understanding of our own character. That, is what we are here to learn. To love who we are..... and realize that we ARE perfectly made to be exactly what we are.  

Sometimes those in the position of teaching us about our spiritual selves, get stuck in their own struggle to feel adequate.  They get stuck in saying we all have character flaws that we can't overcome....because we're human.  

That's true...IF you look at life as though its something that is pass/fail.   To me, that makes no sense when they also say that God knows the outcome.  It's sort of twisted if you give it thought.....its basically being taught that God knows your life is going to be graded as a failure before you are born.....but you are here to struggle and fail....and you are loved. 

 ?????? 

We're listening to other people, on the same journey....try to teach us the way.

Who really knows enough walking on this earth to judge a Character flaw beyond one they know well in their own life? And if they feel they can't rise above that flaw, it stands to reason due to their self built comfort bubble that they want you to believe YOU can't rise above it either?

My thoughts at this point my my journey are this:

Listen to your heart.

What if there is no FAILURE in this life?  What if the supreme truth is exactly this.....that the journey is toward self love, and love of others....and that through things seen as evil, abhorrent, awful....and as  what we term Character flaws....are what help us turn inward, and see our own inner light?  What's seen as a flaw in me through some eyes.....MIGHT be what is admired through other eyes.....who knows? It's about self perspective....and loving others...as well as ourselves, and our surroundings.

Think about this.....

When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

For now we see in a mirror dimly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.

And now abides faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

YOU are the light of the world.....

Love and Light.....

Blessed be.....

Namaste

We Shall OVERCOME

Be LIMITLESS in your view of the world around you......and the doors that are closed around you now, will open up to a whole NEW reality.

Walking between two veils......the me that used to be....and the me I am becoming. And ye harm none.....

After feeling the love wash over me when I had my NDE.....there is no other way to be, and live this life the way we are meant to live it. I'm working on really recognizing what I can control, and what I can't.....and speaking my heart honestly.  Communicating what hurts....trying not to do so in anger, even when invited.

 I'm FAR from perfect. There are times I yell, there are times I am snarky....and I say and do things that I need to work on handling better. There are times I let worry, earthly riches, and the murkiness that surrounds us in this world envelop me--even though I know its no good to do so.

 I own that now....where before, I felt it was an outside thing--temptation that came from outward sources.  It's only temptation when I allow it to be.  Dark sides of everything exist....and that includes with our inner selves. But does that mean we always have to invite it to affect?  Especially when things we are tempted to re-live keep on re-surfacing in our lives?  Why revisit the pain when the lesson has been learned?

 I've learned,  that even doing  that comes from inside me....and I'm trying to immediately recognize it...and work on my actions.  It doesn't attack from outside me.....I attack myself and invite it to affect me.  Yes....dark is a part of life....but I am learning not to let it carry me.....and that includes things in my own past.  It does no good to me if I hold myself hostage.  I'd rather transform from that dark....and move forward in hope to a better future!

One of my favorite sayings....is 'One does not need to attend every argument to which he or she is invited."  (And that includes arguments within our own beings.)

I am making the conscious choice each and every day to walk in love......and that includes loving myself....as well as those I've allowed to affect me in the past.

Reflection about the Christian Easter story from a Pagan Perspective

Today is the day Christians commemorate Holy Thursday--the day of the Last Supper, or the day before the death of Jesus Christ on the Cross.

I have to say that I've got kind of a mixed reflection on this....as a former Catholic who has embraced Pagan self.   I honestly feel as though I've gone through several last suppers in my life, facing the death of things I held fast.

The primary last supper and death I've gone through, was of almost complete dependence on the way others viewed me.  I was afraid for years to really come into my own....and spent my time supping on what others thoughts fed me.  This lead to a dark tomb-like me--because I spent so much time trying to be what everyone else told me I was....or should be. Not only fellow Christians, but I judged myself based on EVERYONE around me. Classmates, teachers, my parents, my sibling....friends who weren't actually friends.....and even friends who were friends, genuinely trying to help, but really didn't know me.  I begged and begged to be removed from this....because it was utterly miserable.  I was withdrawn, in tears all the time, anxious, unable to relax....and fearful. But was I really unable to find peace? Or living through a thick illusion?

  I really was like a naive lamb...a sheep....following others to fall off a cliff, and afraid of the future....losing myself in trying to become the impossible.  I found the stone rolled away one day.....when I hit bottom, and realized I just was not happy....and I LITERALLY decided I deserved better from myself in reaction to all of that, and I just got up and moved into the sunlight.  It honestly was that easy. I had to come to the realization that only I know myself. Everyone else is in the same boat....and many are groping along in their own dark tombs--but pretending THEY have it all together about me.....while trying to figure out their own inner beings. I had to realize everyone else goes through the insecurity, and no one walking with me knows the way any more than I do.  And...learn to not find fault or be angry in the fact that they did perceive me in the way they did.   I am still learning to let go of that anger and rigidity in myself...but I know now, it is possible.

 I had to let higher power take me out of the pain and anguish....and rise to find who I really am....through paying attention to the voice of the Lord and Lady from inside my own soul.  They reside there....all it took was me deciding not to listen to the world....and stop crucifying myself through the world's eyes.

From a Pagan perspective--I see myself now in this respect as in the period of new growth. Hatching from the egg of re-birth.....and finding joy in the fertility of learning who I am.  I LOVE not having to feel unworthy, and embracing my humanness....not as a fault...but as a fact. I actually was blinded to the joy of rebirth....and had to choose to let the stone in my way fall aside.  Now, the world is brightly colored, beautiful even in the pain of struggle.  I haven't arrived....I'm not at my final destination, but I'm letting the world fall away....and learning me.....and the sacred walk I have with the Lord and Lady at my side.

The second aspect of life that I went through a Last Supper/ Gethsemane experience about....was the illusion of only one true path toward peace. Toward God, Lord and Lady, Higher Power....or however one may have that concept sown into their very fabric.  I realized that I was also being judgemental about others.....because again, the world we live in always presents THEIR way....as THE way.  I lived by that with Catholicism, and pushed all other thoughts, concepts and realities away.

It really doesn't matter what way one follows in the world.... when you embrace something, its always THE ONLY way.....no matter what....and everyone else is fallen, needing to be corrected, or covered in someone else's belief to make it to God/Lord and Lady, or even just plain old accepted.

I had to realize I was busy hating myself through others' expectations, not accepting myself, and seeing myself as fallen....beaten in this world.....which is where I relate to the Crucifiction. I was truly suffering....miserable, and pierced by the thorns I grabbed ahold of myself.  And....I think I needed to do that....to really appreciate the relief when I realized it did not need to be that way.

 The difference between myself, and Christ, is he knew he was not beaten, fallen.....he accepted himself and reached higher than his surroundings because of that.  He suffered with the surroundings he had, but he was able to reach higher and leave that behind.

I came to know that I have been offered the promise to reach higher. I've walked out of the dark tomb, towards the bright future of that promise.....and the sunlight is dazzling.....

I'm no longer looking at myself as beaten. Nor am I concerned about whether others think I am right or wrong.....
I'm concerned about being. Its none of my concern what others think....what matters now is that I reach forward....and up. with willingness to reach a hand down to the opportunities presented to share with others....when asked.  Trusting in my relationship in Circle with the Lord and Lady, and the cutting away of that which is not welcome with my Athame....I know that when asked, there is a reason to share, .but no reason to expect others to agree or accept my inner self.....that's up to me to accept and work on.

 I'm seeing me in newness....even though I've always been this me.  I am still becoming.....I am still rising.....but I understand the darkness is part of life too.....

I see the tomb now as not a place of death, but transformation. Every time I find myself in a dark place....I'm learning not to crawl around focusing on the dark.....but to learn from it, use it as a transforming force in my being....and again, find the light.

I am empowered......strengthened....and blessed with dark and light. And, I know I will find other tombs from which I will need to emerge....but I also no longer live in doubt that I will come out changed and living in the promise of greater joy!

One final thought passed across my mind as I was writing today. Its about a biblical passage--Matthew 19:23-24:

Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.”

The first verse in this passage speaks to me of living humbly. Not going about saying that one has all the answers, or has it all together. I know that I will always be learning....and discarding things that I do not need to carry.  My burden has been lightened a lot....and the riches around me in the earth, in those I love, and in the knowledge I gain are not mine to own....but to share.   I think what is referenced here is the aspect of becoming too burdened, too fat because of what we choose to carry to pass through that eye. And discarding or giving is continual....much like as the act of moving forward lessens our load.

Lord and Lady, help me recognize when I am burdened by too much stuff...stuck in the dark....and help me reach for the light....leaving un-needed things behind....and not clinging to others' stuff.....I love you!